Do you find that you’ll sometimes put off asking someone something? Do you try to edit your plan so they don’t need anyone else’s buy-in?
These can indicate a very subtle fear of rejection.
Fear of rejection is often overt and easy to identify. But sometimes fear is sneaky (especially if your mind thinks a particular fear is important to keep) and doesn’t always show up as a clear, in-your-face feeling.
If you are afraid of rejection, (or notice you put off or try to work around asking people things) don’t worry, this isn’t actually as silly as you think.
I’ll explain in an ever-so-slightly roundabout manner:
Thousands of years ago, when we were all tribal nomads, we very strongly depended on the people immediately surrounding us for survival. Everything was a group effort—it was hard to do all the hunting, gathering, child-rearing, clothes-making, etc individually.
So if the group you were part of—you could say your tribe—cast you out, your odds of surviving went down a LOT.
Okay, I’ll get to how this is relevant today. Since social approval often was a matter of life and death in the past, people who took it seriously were more likely to live. This assessment of how important it was got passed on to their descendants.
So most of us today are likely to take social approval quite seriously. Sometimes to the point of feeling like it’s life or death, even though we know in our heads that it’s not.
While there are many, rejection can be a form of social disapproval. If this fear stops you, don’t beat yourself up over it—your body is designed to alert you to serious threats (and this did used to be a serious threat).
Tapping can quiet this alert system down very quickly. With enough of it, tapping can even get your brain to re-wire so it’s no longer signalling the alarm over something that isn’t actually a threat now.
Don’t worry though, your fight-or-flight response will still work when there is a real physical danger. EFT does not break your brain.
Why bother dealing with how you feel though? Why not just buck up and get on with it?
Your feelings impact your behaviour WAY more than most people realize. People can also usually pick up on how you’re feeling, and it will influence their response to you.
Ready to zap any fear of rejection you might have? Watch the video below where I’ll help you do just that:
My Facebook group, Dynamic and Free Society, is a community of people looking to reduce stress and anxiety without having to short-change themselves on their dreams and goals. There's way more tapping where this came from. Click here to join, for free.